Hello gentle Americans.  Poor, pretty John Edwards.  Once again he is front-page news as his mistress makes their torrid affair public, showing pictures of their 2 year-old love child, that was birthed from their heated nights of passion behind his cancer stricken, pack mule of a wife.   Sound messy, huh?

Just a little gay?

His sex addiction and self destruction are so strong that during his presidential race he through care and common sense to the wind and bedded this bimbo, which has since come to back to bite him in his smooth ass.  The bimbo is trying to come across as a saint, saying she was seduced by his sexual power when really she is just another blond home wrecking slut. John Edwards surely is not innocent; he is just another sex craved political egomaniac.  Why these two are as American and apple pie and baseball.  Aren’t you proud to be an American today?

Honestly I really don’t think of this as news worthy, once again it is the mild distraction between more pressing problems, such as health care reform, global warming and bankruptcy.   Though secretly I wish I could have been born a blond bimbo whose retirement plan consisted of a vagina and popping out another women’s husbands child; thus selling the story to the press and making a fortune for myself in the process.  But the reality is I am a green wigged drag queen with a cock and balls whose only chance of bedding a celebrity is slim.  Besides the only woman I am attracted to is Sharon Osborne and her vagina is as dry as the Sahara.

Stay fresh,

x

Hello gentle Americans.  I just watched Lady Gaga’s new video for Telephone and all I can say is how many envelopes can one girl push-murder, Lesbianism, freaky fashions, prison, bad acting and the most shocking offender of all-littering!

Yes my Earth loving people there is one scene where Gaga gets out of prison, the lovely Beyonce is waiting in a car for her, she feeds Gaga a sugary treat, Gaga takes a huge bite out of it and then the now stank Beyonce throws it out the window onto the pavement!  How careless!  There are enough people out there who think that the street is there garbage can and they drop their droppings wherever they please. Now the just received permission by one of the biggest stars in the world that littering is ok. “I saw Beyonce do it in a video so why can’t I?’ I can hear one of her ignorant fans defending her bad behavior.  They can’t separate the fact that this is a video and not real life, this is the life they want to have and they will go to any lengths to emulate it.

Now killing and littering will become part of the fabulous life of those wanting to be rich and famous and the Earth will once again be the victim of another hate crime.  But sadly we all suffer when someone litters.  So fuck you Beyonce and Gaga!  I demand an immediate apology.

Stay fresh,

x