Hello gentle Americans.  Currently I am preparing for my summer move to PTOWN and god willing I will be dazzling the crowds with my new show-EAT ME!  Playing at the UU THEATER, 236 Commercial Street.

EAT ME is a compilation of some of my classic stand-up comedy along with memorable original songs and song parodies.  This year I have written several new song parodies, tearing up Beyonce’s RING ON IT, Timberlake’s SEXY BACK and even a timeless Culture Club song.  And I proud to say I have written 3 new original tunes, one aptly named after the title of the show.  I really love the chorus in EAT ME, it just has that certain something, that magic that when you listen to it just sticks in your head; in a good way of course.  Not like a hacky Celine Dion song that sticks to you like carbs to a chubby girl.

I am making really good headway, thanks to my loyal fans, in RuPaul’s Drag Race.  Entering the contest a week after the rest of the competition I have managed to rise to the top 5 spot which makes my little heart proud.  Perhaps I won’t make it to #1 because those girls holding that spot have well over 20,000 votes. But who knows, stranger things have happened, and I could very well take the #1 spot. It is all about positive visualization, if you want something you have visualize it.  Olympic athletes do that all the time and I personally know it works.  When I want a man with large member to make sweet love to me I visualize it.  His hands, the look in his eye, why even the color of his hair.  Invariably this man of my imagination will pop up seemingly out of nowhere and the next thing I know we are in the throws of passion, drenching my 1,800 thread count Egyptian sheets with our sweat.  You should try it people you will pleasantly surprised.

Stay fresh,

x

WHAT: 9 to 5 the Broadway musical: takes place in the 1970’s, 3 secretaries  try to climb the corporate ladder but there is one big obstacle-Their piggish male of a boss.

Where: Marquis Theater /1535 Broadway/  New York, NY 10036 /(212) 382-0100

Hello gentle Americans. The other night I attended the Broadway show 9 to 5 adapted from the movie of the same name.  The movie starred the iconic songstress Dolly Parton, comedy queen Lilly Tomlin and the legendary Jane Fonda.  It’s snappy dialogue and time relevant story line of 3 women trying to make it in male dominated corporate America made it a smash hit in 1980.  Perhaps if I had never seen the movie I would have felt differently about the play. But Flash-forward to 2009 and you have a lukewarm, overproduced, underwhelming musical monster.

The actresses in this production are competent but none of them have that star quality, that ‘it’ factor that could have sold this musical.  Sadly the songs (written by Dolly Parton) are cheery but ultimately forgettable.  And the emotional center of the play, Allison Janney (in the Lily Tomlin role) singing chops are weak at best.

Patricia Resnick, who co-wrote the original movie and adapted it for the stage, has made some very strange artistic choices. Taking away some favorite moments in the motion picture and replacing them with theatrical moments that never occurred in the movie left me with a bad taste in my mouth. Or maybe that was the $5 bag of M & M’s I purchased during intermission?  I am sure it is not an easy task to make such an amazing movie work for the stage, and it must have been a hardship to figure what scenes stayed and what went, but to make a lack luster love interest for Allison Janney was just not necessary and it did not work.

The first act of the play does have some fun staging; watching the set turn and disappear and reappear as something else right in front of your eyes is a joy to watch. The dream sequence was also very memorable.  You may recall in the movie where the girls decided to get some R & R and go to Dolly’s house and smoke some pot and fantasize how they would like to kill the boss?  Thankfully they kept this in the show and successfully recreated it.   The second act just drags along and is filled with sappy musical numbers that made my skin crawl.

While waiting in the lobby for the second act to begin, watching the audience mill about, they did not seem to hate this musical but they did not seem to love it either. Luke warm was the impression I got, which I think is the kiss of death in the theater as well as in the bedroom. Though if you if have not seen the movie you may enjoy this play, finding it’s light-hearted entertainment to be just what the doctor ordered.  I prefer the movie and plan on watching it tonight, hooting it up with the original trio of ladies over a warm bowl of popcorn.  And at a cost of about $5 I can’t think of more lovely and economical way to spend my Friday night.

Stay fresh,